I have been reading the posts made by James (you know who I mean) for a what seems like a long time, and I have some theories that I think need to be investigated.

1, It could be that James is really a ten year old boy, who is quite adept at using computers. If so, he is not old enough to drive, and therefore it would explain some of his posts. It is also curious that he said he is taking a week off. Could it be that he is actually going to camp???

2. It is possible that James is actually an alien being, and that his avatar is really a self portrait. This again would explain some of his more interesting ideas and sometimes lack of basic knowledge concerning cars, driving, and life on this planet.

3. Could it be that there is really no James at all, and it is just an errant computer program stuck in a loop on this forum, generating random posts from a list of paragraphs in a database somewhere? The posts could be driven by key words in a thread.

4. It could also be that James is actually a high level Daimler Chrysler executive, testing out our allegiance to Daimler, Chrysler, and our beloved Crossfires. This would explain why he seems to try to divide us up with postings that sometimes put us in agreement with his views, when in our hearts we know it is wrong.....

5. Or it could just be that James is really what he says he is - a young man with dreams of owning a Crossfire.

In any event, when ever he posts to this forum, he generates very stong feelings, which I have termed as the "James Effect". This phenomenon needs to be studied and researched to determine the long term effects on this forum and its members.

I repectfully offer my services in this regard. All that is neccessary is for the members of this forum to offer up a small stipend in the amount of six million dollars in U.S currency for my expenses during my research. As soon as the required funds are ready for deposit, I will forward the number of a Swiss bank account for you to use.

I am sure that I will be able to determine and report back to you within five or six years. However, if the research has not been completed by then, I would like the opportunity to re-approach the members of this forum to ask for additional funds and time to complete this necessary and valuable research.

Resepctfully yours,