I've had hundreds of "dealer experiences" that span the range of results, from "Annie, get my gun!" to "You da Man!"

The latest was for bringing in my other car (Chrysler Jeep dealer) for fused reverse clutches in the auto trans - fixed under warrantee for no charge, and at the same dealer a replacement PCM in a different other car (Chrysler Jeep) that left my wallet flaming and my a$$ bleeding. But it was fixed.

I launched my Crossfire over a traffic island (International Drive and Galleria Drive in Tysons Corner) in the dark and rain. The steering wheel became misaligned - a symptom of whacked suspension geometry (not that flying through the air over a steep curb wasn't enough of a clue... )

I had brand new tires to mount anyway, and was lucky that the wheels were undamaged (amazing), so I took it to the Chrysler dealer to get the alignment and tires mounted. They told me they couldn't do it because they "didn't have the right equipment". They were going to job it out to Bubba down the street. I said no thanks and called the Mercedes dealer.

The Mercedes dealer welcomed me with open arms, with "Sir" this, and "Yes Sir" that. And from their perspective I was the jacka$$ because I showed up with all the relevant pages from the factory manual printed out and marked up with my instructions (tire install procedure because of sensors, suspension geometry and points about "repair nuts"). I just figured they might have the MB info but find the Crossfire specifics handy). But as well intended as you can be with specific instructions, dealers don't always like it coming from some "idiot" customer. Never mind I work for an aerospace company as an engineer...

Anyway, they "Yes Sir" me all the way through the process, hand me back my detailed-for-free car, with the old tires all disposed (wear bars showing), and the suspension all fixed. The bill was equal to the cost of a generic wheel alignment and four-tire mount job at a wheel and tire shop. They
kissed my a$$ one more time as I left and life was good.

I never got any disparaging run around, no disrespect, and all my needs were met. But here's a couple tips to help you get that service.

Like peter_k said, go in with a very specific and well documented laundry list of what you want done. If you are unclear, uncertain, or (heaven forbid) wrong, you have already made your first mistake. You just put a "Victim / Idiot" sticker on your chest.

Next, you make it clear in your nicest, most pleasant and polite way (practice if you're not good at this...) make it abundantly clear that you want your list worked completely with no excuses. Allow flexibility for their schedule and the delay for parts, but allow no compromise on what you want done. You're telling them:

• you know what's wrong,
• what's to be done, and
• what you expect when you come to pick up the car.

It's called "setting expectations". If you leave and the dealer is still not sure what you want, you just put a sticker on your back that says

"Kick Me!"

.

Perhaps one of the most important things is how you present yourself and your car. If you show up in greasy jeans with a filthy car, you just told the dealer that you and your car do not deserve respect. How can you expect them to treat your car with all the love you have for it, if you don't send that message when you show up? Make sure that car is spotless inside and out when you bring it to them. This silently tells them that:

• you care about your car,
• every little detail about its condition is known to you, and
• any screw up along these lines is going result in a bad response from you.

And your appearance - it's not too much to show up in your very best clothes. (The tux with the ruffly shirt is too much) but a sport jacket with a button up or polo shirt and dress slacks and shoes is just the ticket. The service writer is going to be standing there in his company costume with his name sewed on his breast, and you are going to be standing there in your "costume" that sends a powerful message -

• "I am not stupid" (if you are, better keep your mouth shut),
• "I have the means to deal with you if you screw up" (don't ever say that or give off that attitude), and
• in a very subtle way puts you over him (you are the customer, the customer is always right, he works for you, the customer).

If you're not dressed at least this well, you are putting yourself up as an equal, and potential as a subordinate person. You must come at them as the "alpha dog" or you have already set yourself up to be biotch slapped.

Do not under-estimate the importance of this point. Do your own experiments at stores - go in dressed like a street person, go home and change into some casual dress clothes, and go back and go to the same service person. You will be stunned at the difference in service.

Finally, remember that nobody is perfect, and you are going to be disappointed if you expect perfection. Stay flexible, and work with the dealer to reach the result you want. You might have to go back, stand your ground, and even repeat what you want several times. We live in a world where good service is pretty darned rare. You have to insist on it while maintaining a civil behavior. That doesn't mean you can't work your way up the management chain politely but firmly if you don't get what you want at first. Don't wait for the car to be done either - if the service writer isn't "getting it" just politely ask for the service manager or general manager. But the minute you flash the "A$$#0LE" card, you pretty much shoot yourself in the head so be nice.

And if you keep trying the same things and keep getting the same (lousy) result (the definition of insanity) it's time to try something (another dealer) else.