Here's a wacky idea:

Get an LS7, rip out the old ECU or run a piggyback (yes, they're not that effective, but we'll work it out along the way. If we didn't, it wouldn't be called tuning), drop that mo fo between the fenders, and start it. Get some wide-*** tires in the back, go out and kill AMG's with good ol' Uncle Sam hiding under the hood. Laugh until you bust after the guy driving that SL63 realizes your "stock" Crossfire isn't actually stock.

You don't need ABS, you don't need traction control. All you need is common sense and keep in mind that the road is not the track.

Any questions?