Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father.

He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up
and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest.

After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?"

His father replied, "because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure
that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."

Johnny, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS man wants to buy Mom."