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Old 07-05-2017, 01:18 AM
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onehundred80
onehundred80 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Ontario
Age: 84
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Default Re: Humor and Clean Jokes

Headline News!!!!

Murder at Costco

Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems
by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary and then arranging to have her killed.
A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie
explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $10,000.


The Husband said he was willing to pay that amount but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's
insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single
dollar coin that rested inside.
Artie sighed, rolled his eyes and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.



A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Costco Supermarket. There, he surprised her in the produce
department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath
and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene.
Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.



However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the
store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the premises.
Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements
with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.


The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared...













"ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 in Costco Produce section'.



 

Last edited by onehundred80; 07-05-2017 at 11:15 AM.