Originally Posted by
dedwards0323
Perks of Being over 60:- Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
- Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
- Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
- Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
- In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
- No one expects you to run--anywhere.
- People call at 9 pm and ask, "Did I wake you?"
- People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
- There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
- Things you buy now won't wear out.
- You think humor must be good for your body, exercise and diets haven't worked well.
- You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.
- You can live without sex but not without glasses.
- You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.
- You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
- You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
- You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
- You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
- You sing along with elevator music.
- Your eyes won't get much worse.
- Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
- You know more about prescription drugs than you pharmacist
- You can't remember who sent you this list.
- My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
- Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.
- It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.
- These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."
Hilarious!! But sadly for me all true, except the coffee maker one, I don't sound anything like that.............. That I can remember.