I recenctly bought the Cup Holder replacement Bin for my crossfire and found on the forum the instructions for the removal of the old cup holder, which involves taking out the back half of the console.

https://www.crossfireforum.org/forum...ferrerid=19517

In the insructions is says that the toughest step in the exercise is to get the rubber boot off the Handbrake and that liquid soap is a good lubricant. I had no liquid soap, so I thought I would pick some up next time I am at the supermarket. Some weeks later I was at "Woolies" picking up some groceries, and as I was getting some deoderant I noticed next to the condoms some personal lubricant KY which was an oily lubricant, it said on the bottle it does not affect rubber, perfect. I Grabbed a small bottle and took it home and set about going through the steps to put in the bin even though it was 9pm at night and having to turn the ignition every now and then to turn on the interior light.

The KY worked a treat, the rubber handbrake boot came off first go after squirting the KY down inside the boot. The cup holder was removed and the bin was in and the console replaced within 15 mins. Too proud... man with tools fix something, ugg !!

The next morning I get a phonecall from my wife on the way to work wanting to know why there is a KY personal lubricant bottle in the crossfire and and some on the handbrake and seat. It was dark and I missed cleaning it all up.

I explained the story, and you know how sometimes you are not 100% sure they believe you even though they say they do.

 

That's your story, and your sticking to it.
Why were you looking at the condoms when you were buying deodorant in the first place?

 

What are the odds of that? It's the same story I told my wife when I left the KY jelly in my Crossfire. What's Woolies anyway? Is that what you call Walmart down under?

 

Great story!!! Had to share that one with my wife. Both got a kick out of it!

 

You have two wives?

 

So the question is....now what will you do with the unused portion of the KY Jelly ??

 

Note to self, NEVER get KY Jelly on the interior of the wife's xfire.

Note to OxCrossfire, the first time you come home with lipstick on your collar, you're toast!

 

Because he is 'down under'............ROFL

 

Did you treat her good, and get the warming type?

 

"Woolies" is Woolworths, the supermarket variety. In the same section as the Deodorant are condoms and lubricant to be used "Down Under" thanks for that little Gem. The only time we put on deodorant down here is when we think we might get some action. <g>

As a matter of fact it was the Warming Type It is coming into winter down here after all and I wouldn't be so crule to use anything else on her..... ehem.... the Crossfire that is.

At least if I had lipstick on my collar she would know I was at least having an affair and not making love to my crossfire

 

The important thing is that you got the handle off............ Surrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre you did.

 

You guys are way too funny!

 

I was telling a mate about my dillema and it reminded him of a joke I though I would share.

A tractor salesman was travellng around the outback and thought he would call in on a farmer who he had never been able to convince to buy a new tractor, as he was just happy to putt around on his old massey ferguson.

He drove the couple of K's down his dirt track driveway and noticed the farmer sitting on his front verandah. The farmer greeted him and offered him a seat and a beer. They exchanged small talk for a little while and the salesman said. "Any possiblity of selling you a tractor today?" to which the old farmer said "maybe, let me tell you a story"

the farmer continued "I was out the back shed milking daisy the house cow, I sat down on my stool put the pale under to old girl and started milking. I was there for about 10 minutes had a few inches of milk in the bottom of the pale when the old girl kicked the pale over. I set it back up and gave her a couple of more squirts and she did it again. to stop her doing it again I grabbed a piece of rope and tied one leg to the side of the shed. I set myself back up sat down then she kicked the pale over with the other leg. This means war I thought and decided to tie the other leg to the other side of the shed."

"That would have fixed it" said the salesman "not quite" said the farmer and he continued with the story.

"I sat back down on my stool and started milkin'. I was there for about 5 minutes before her tale came hurtling around copped me in the head, I went *** over and kicked the pale on my way down. Angrily I got another piece of rope, tied one end to her tail and another to a rock and threw the rock up onto the roof of the shed"

"The would have done the trick" said the salesman "Well this is where you might help me" said the farmer.

The farmer continued "Before getting back to the milking I need to do a pee so I flopped out the old fella and did a pee down the side of the shed. Just as I was finishing and putting the wedding tackle back in my pants the missus came around the corner'

"Now if you can convince my missus that I'm not ******** that cow. I'll buy that tractor !!!! "

 

LOL good story

 

Great story !!
Of course, WE believe you.
Just make sure that you keep both hands on the keyboard when you're posting or she may become suspicious.

I also liked the one post where a man's wife called and asked what he was doing.
He told her he was having sex with the neighbor, and she replied "You're detailing your car again, aren't you."

 

Or the one where a school teacher was having a rendezvous with another school teacher in a classroom after school. When they had finished he put some chalk dust behind his ears.

When he got home his wife asked where he had been and he said he was having an affair with another teacher. She said "No your not you have been playing pool with your mates at the pub I can see the chalk dust behind your ears"

 

Men........LOL and you all think your wifes brush their teeth with those electric toothbrushes.....LOL