Humor and Clean Jokes
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 8,502
Likes: 1,131
From: St Louis MO
Re: Humor and Clean Jokes
What’s it called when a group of rabbits hops backwards? A receding hare line.
Beavers never go on strike because they do their dam job
A typo on a headstone is called a grave mistake
Beavers never go on strike because they do their dam job
A typo on a headstone is called a grave mistake
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 8,502
Likes: 1,131
From: St Louis MO
Re: Humor and Clean Jokes
One day a blind man goes to a restaurant. The server asked him if he’d like to see the menu. The blind man says: “no, I am blind, just bring me a dirty fork and I will smell it and order”. The server, confused, goes to the kitchen, and brings back a dirty fork. The blind man smells it and says: “I’ll have the beef steak with mash potatoes and gravy and some chocolate brownies for dessert”. The server brings him his food and the blind man enjoys his meal, pays the bill and leaves. Next week, the blind man goes back to the same restaurant. The server recognizes him and wanting to see how good the blind man’s sense of smell is, he goes to the kitchen and asks his wife, Brenda, for a spoon. He instructs his wife, Brenda, to rub the spoon all over her body and so she does. The server hands the dirty spoon to the blind man. The blind man takes a whiff and says: “I didn’t know Brenda worked here.”
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 8,502
Likes: 1,131
From: St Louis MO
Re: Humor and Clean Jokes
Next time you are out in your Crossfire, look for these streets.
These are Actual Street names:
— Haviture Way (Eagle Mountain, Utah)
— Throwita Way (Placerville, Calif.)
— Harry Baals Drive (Fort Wayne, Ind.)
— Divorce Court (Heather Highlands, Pa.)
— Hanky Panky Street (Las Vegas, Nev.)
— Psycho Path (Traverse City, Mich.)
— Shades of Death Road (Warren County, N.J.)
— Bloody Lyre Road (Cripple Creek, Colo.)
— Bucket of Blood Street (Holbrook, Ariz.)
— Tapeworm Road (Chester County, Pa.)
— Beach Blanket Babylon Boulevard (San Francisco, Calif.)
— Tennis Court (Los Angeles, Calif.)
— Manlove Road (Sacramento, Calif.)
— Kangaroo Court (several locations around U.S.)
— Antonio and Banderas are two roads that intersect in Rancho Santa Margarita, Calif.
— Rode Road (Brisbane, Australia)
— Twiggly Wiggly Road (British Columbia, Canada)
— Butt Street (Erie, Pa.)
— Chicken Dinner Road (Canyon County, Utah)
— Dumb Woman’s Lane (East Sussex, United Kingdom)
— This Street, That Street and The Other Street (all in Porters Lake, Nova Scotia)
— Duh Drive (Bethlehem, Pa.)
— This Ain’t It Road (Dadeville, Ala.)
These are Actual Street names:
— Haviture Way (Eagle Mountain, Utah)
— Throwita Way (Placerville, Calif.)
— Harry Baals Drive (Fort Wayne, Ind.)
— Divorce Court (Heather Highlands, Pa.)
— Hanky Panky Street (Las Vegas, Nev.)
— Psycho Path (Traverse City, Mich.)
— Shades of Death Road (Warren County, N.J.)
— Bloody Lyre Road (Cripple Creek, Colo.)
— Bucket of Blood Street (Holbrook, Ariz.)
— Tapeworm Road (Chester County, Pa.)
— Beach Blanket Babylon Boulevard (San Francisco, Calif.)
— Tennis Court (Los Angeles, Calif.)
— Manlove Road (Sacramento, Calif.)
— Kangaroo Court (several locations around U.S.)
— Antonio and Banderas are two roads that intersect in Rancho Santa Margarita, Calif.
— Rode Road (Brisbane, Australia)
— Twiggly Wiggly Road (British Columbia, Canada)
— Butt Street (Erie, Pa.)
— Chicken Dinner Road (Canyon County, Utah)
— Dumb Woman’s Lane (East Sussex, United Kingdom)
— This Street, That Street and The Other Street (all in Porters Lake, Nova Scotia)
— Duh Drive (Bethlehem, Pa.)
— This Ain’t It Road (Dadeville, Ala.)
Senior Member
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 8,502
Likes: 1,131
From: St Louis MO
Re: Humor and Clean Jokes
HOW TO WASH A CAT:
1.Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe her while you carry her towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash-and-rinse." Don't worry - - - kitty won't go "down the tube," 'cause she won't fit.
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where she will dry herself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
1.Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe her while you carry her towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash-and-rinse." Don't worry - - - kitty won't go "down the tube," 'cause she won't fit.
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where she will dry herself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
