With a very seductive voice a wife asked her husband
"Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No" said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top three buttons of her blouse and slowly reached down in her cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar Bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly.

She then asked "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No I haven't" he said with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile pulled up her skirt, seductively reached into her tight sheer panties and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation.

"Now" she said "Have you ever seen 50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No way" he said, becoming even more aroused and excited to which she replied:
She said "Go look in the garage......."

 

 

 

 

 

Three dogs were sitting in the waiting room at the vet.
The Black Labrador asked the yellow Labrador "So why are you here?"
The yellow Lab replied, "I'm a pisser. I **** on everything....the sofa, the curtains, the cat, the kids. But the final straw was last night when I pissed in the middle of my owner's bed."
The black Lab said, "So what's the vet going to do? "
"Gonna cut my nuts off," came the reply from the yellow Lab. "They reckon it'll calm me down."
"And why are you here?" the Yellow Lab asked the Black.
The Black Lab said, "I'm a digger. I dig under fences, dig up flowers and trees, I dig just for the hell of it. When I'm inside, I dig up the carpets. But I went over the line last night when I dug a great big hole in my owners' couch."
"So what are they going to do to you?" the Yellow Lab inquired.
"Looks like I'm losing my nuts too," the dejected Black Lab said.
The Black Lab then turned to the Great Dane and asked, "Why are you here?
"I'm a humper,"said the Great Dane. "I'll hump anything. I'll hump the cat,a pillow, the table, and fence posts, whatever. I want to hump everything I see. "Yesterday my owner had just got out of the shower and was bending down to dry her feet, and I just couldn't help myself. I hopped on her back and started hammering away."
The Black and the Yellow Labs exchanged a sad glance. "So, its nuts off for you too, huh?"
The Great Dane said, "No, apparently I'm here to get my nails clipped! "